The Charlie Brown Syndrome

Is there someone in your life who is the one who has all the weird stuff happen to them?  Stuff that would never in a million years ever happen to anyone else?  Like Charlie Brown; in fact, we’ll call it the Charlie Brown Syndrome.

In my life...it’s me.

I don’t know why.  Maybe I have bad karma or there are some wee people out there who just take delight in harassing me with this crap.  

I can’t recount all the bizzaro stuff I’ve had happen, but one thing stands out in my mind as worth sharing.  

Years ago, I was driving to Rochester on 75th Street.  That’s the county road that goes east and west through Douglas to Highway 52.  I was heading east and just topped the hill out of Douglas when I saw something out of the corner of my eye and realized it was the wheel from a car.

Not a piece of rubber, or a hubcap, or a lug nut.  It was the ENTIRE freaking wheel...tire, hubcap, and rim.

I had a nanosecond to think, “That’s weird” before my truck abruptly listed to the rear left, and there was a horrible, horrible grinding sound.  

Then I had a longer second to think, “Oh shit!” as I realized that the wheel now quickly rolling down the highway without me was mine and I was sliding sideways down the road with my left rear part-that-holds-the-wheel-on scraping along the asphalt.  

In the five seconds it took me to steer to the side of the road and get stopped, my mind simply went blank.  Then it went to “What the fudge just happened?!”

I got out to look, and sure enough, my truck was sitting lopsided on the side of the road minus a left rear wheel.

Who else in the whole entire universe would have all five lug nuts come loose and disappear while driving?!?!  Nobody, that’s who.  Only me.

Well, not really only me.

 

Captain is also one who only has the weird stuff happen, except most of his bizarre experiences happen at the dentist’s office.  Like when he went to have the post for a dental implant installed and the screw went right through the top of his jaw because he didn’t have enough bone to anchor it to.  He ended up having to have a bone graft before having the implant post finally inserted.  It delayed the whole process by three months.

Then, the other day he needed an urgent dental appointment due to a toothache that had dogged him all weekend.  Upon examination, the dentist said he needed a root canal.  While they were drilling out the tooth to prep for the root canal, the drill bit broke off in his tooth and stuck there.

Not just the tip, the whole drill bit!

Seriously, who has this kind of thing happen?!  I get that accidents happen--and this was completely a freak accident through no fault of anyone--but geez!  They put a temp filling in place to protect the tooth until he can see an oral surgeon to remove the drill bit.

I don’t know where Captain got his information--probably Google--but he claims that this will involve attaching some sort of contraption to his head and vibrating it to shake the drill bit loose.  That sounds dicey to me, but what do I know?  I’m not an oral surgeon.

They say being unique is something to be proud of, but sometimes being dull and ordinary has it’s perks.

Images used:
http://www.truthrevolt.org/sites/default/files/styles/content_full_width/public/field/image/articles/screen_shot_2015-11-02_at_1.17.51_pm.jpg?itok=njLCgtWV
http://static1.comicvine.com/uploads/original/11/110544/2081371-charlie_brown_lucy_5356.jpg
http://nb9.stumbleupon.netdna-cdn.com/mDo1FnajLCKKe0fa2RZHKg