Be Careful What You Wish For

Image courtesy of AZ Quotes.com

In this season of wishing for things, I am reminded that it pays to be careful what you wish for. My Christmas this year will be overshadowed by a surgical procedure to replace my breast implants because of scar tissue that caused one to flip backwards. No snickers from the peanut gallery please!

The reason I opened with being careful what you wish for is that for most of my adult life, I wished I had a bigger bra size.  In fact, I remember when I first started working at Mayo Clinic as a surgical recorder in Dermatology Surgery, I jokingly asked one of the surgeons why I could have the fat sucked out of my belly and injected into my boobs, effectively solving two problems at one time.  He answered me seriously that it wasn't possible because belly fat and boob fat were not compatible and would not work.  That was 1995.

Fast forward to 2017 when I was diagnosed with breast cancer and underwent a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction.  Lo and behold, one of the reconstructions options was--get this--fat grafting; basically the same thing I had asked about back in 1995!  I declined this option in 2017 because it sounded a little too involved and complicated for me.  

Fast forward again to 2023.  I had my preoperative appointment with my surgeon yesterday, and he said that exchanging my defective implants with newer, better ones that (1) are more resistant to scar tissue formation and (2) significantly less likely to flip was the plan.  I said I was fine with that.  

He went on to say that he could augment the effects of the implants with some minor fat grafting.  I think it was a nice way of saying he could make my middle-aged figure look a little bit...perkier.  Sure, I am game for that this time around.  

So it occurred to me that I was getting what I had wanted for so long.  I just had to get breast cancer to do it.  Let me interject here that my breast cancer journey was infinitely less traumatic than most women.  I didn't have to have chemotherapy or radiation or hormone therapy, so I praise God for that.  

The other eventful thing happening in Brogan world in the near future is a kitchen remodel project.  I have been dreaming of this for seven years now and am so excited that I'm finally getting my wish.

I only had to lose my mom and receive an inheritance to get it.  Again, be careful what you wish for.  I know Mom would be happy that this is happening; I remember how happy she was when she remodeled her kitchen.  I just wish...maybe I shouldn't do that, but I wish she was here to see it.  

Then I remember that those who have passed are never really gone as long as we remember them.  I remembered my mom and channeled my inner Max to help Captain solve a fix-it issue.  The auger on his whole corn bulk bin got a hole in it so that corn dribbles out on the ground when Captain runs the auger.  

This brought back memories of my childhood and filling the feed chutes for the milking parlor.  Mom was in charge of filling these hoppers during each milking.  The "feed room" was in the loft above the parlor.  There was a small Harvestor silo with high moisture corn that got augered up to the feed room, run through a roller mill to crush it, and then it was augered across the feed room to three hoppers above each of the three feed chutes for the stalls in the parlor.  This cross auger had three holes cut in it above each of the hoppers.    

Let me say here that my mom was our very own MacGyver in a skirt.  Give her bubble gum, baling wire, duck tape, and/or WD40, and she could fix just about anything.  Remind me to tell you sometime about how she fixed the baler timing mechanism when Dad couldn't figure it out.  

Image courtesy of WD40.co.uk

But I digress.

So Mom needed a way to block the corn to any given hopper so that the corn would travel to the next available hopper.  It didn't take her long to come up with a solution.  She raided her coffee can collection for two coffee cans.  She cut out the bottoms of the cans and then used the tin snips to cut the can so that it could be snugged around the auger.  She tightened the coffee can to the auger with some good old baling wire (didn't I tell you!!).  This was, she could simply slide the coffee can over the hole in the auger without endanger her fingers.  So smart!

I won't say that I wish I could see Mom again because that would require my death and I'm not ready for that yet.  I will just say that I will be glad to see her again when the time comes.  

Don't wish your lives away, my friends.  Be present in your present and be grateful for everything that is good and right in your world.

Merry Christmas and God bless you!

Image courtesy of everydaypower.com

Scared Silly

Courtesy of Know Your Meme

I have never quibbled about the fact that I have a fear of the dark.  I have also been transparent in my fascination with all things true crime.  Those seem mutually exclusive, don't they?  And one might think that the true crime obsession would fuel the phobia about the dark.  

However, I often have a true crime podcast playing as I'm going to sleep with no ill effects or scary dreams.  It just doesn't bother me.  

Or, more accurately, it didn't until last night.

So, on the true crime front, anybody who knows anything about true crime drama knows that Keith Morrison is the gold standard for narration of same.  That man could make reading the phone book dramatic and suspenseful!  

So imagine my utter delight when I discovered that on Audible, Keith Morrison has started narrating scary classic stories, beginning with The Legend of Sleepy Hollow.  

I don't know about you, but my knowledge of the story all comes from the 1949 Disney animated movie.  I've never actually read the original story.  But since Mr. Morrison was narrating it, I downloaded it and started listening.  

Courtesy of IMDb

I was not disappointed in the narration.  It was a good mix of the actual story plus pithy personal insights by Keith at the end of each installment which, of course, ended on a cliff-hanger part.  I haven't actually gotten to any of the really scary part of it, though. 

Or, more accurately, I didn't until last night. 

On a side note, and to make you fully appreciate the rest of this story, our farm is on the northern edge of a quaint little curvy valley called Devil's Kitchen.  

Why is it called Devil's Kitchen, you might ask?  Well, let me tell you the version I know.  If you know a different version--and some of you might--I'd love to hear it.  

Back when Minnesota was still a new state or perhaps before that even, there was a family that settled into a wooded valley northwest of Rochester.  It was a generational household with grandparents, parents, and children all living in a cabin.  

Here's where things get vague.  The version I heard was that when the civil war broke out, the men all went to fight.  This left the two adult women and an unknown number of children but for sure one infant. Only the father returned from the war, and when he did, it was to a pile of ashes where the cabin had stood and no surviving family.  This triggered a psychotic break, and he apparently haunts to valley now. 

When Captain and I got married and started working at Mayo Clinic, I would drive into Pine Island to catch the commuter bus to work.  I often ended up sitting with the man whose family currently lived on the property where that cabin had supposedly burned down.  He told me during one ride that there had been an incident when his family was all seated at the table for supper, and he felt a hand on his shoulder. 

Courtesy of cheezburger.com

Even though anyone with hands was currently seated at the table with hands accounted for.  

Not only that, he told me that his family members saw the indentation on his shirt where it appeared a hand rested.  Again, all corporeal hands were presented and accounted for, and none of them were anywhere near his shoulder.  

He didn't seem particularly scared by the incident; more puzzled and fascinated.  I was just glad I wasn't the one living in that house!

So, resuming where I left off.  I had to stop at a neighbor's last night to drop off some paperwork and pick up a check.  They live on the other side of Devil's Kitchen.  When I drove over there, it was bright daylight, but when I left it was full dark.  

I got in my van, connected the blue tooth feature on my phone, turned Keith Morrison's narration of Sleepy Hollow on, and headed home. 

Through Devil's Kitchen.  

And wouldn't you know it....wouldn't you JUST know it...that's when the the scary bit about the Headless Horseman chasing Ichabod Crane through the dark and spooky woods of Sleepy Hollow came through the speakers.  

If there were any fireballs or specters or other apparitions out and about in Devil's Kitchen last night, I did not see them because I was driving like a bat out of hell and there were black spots dancing in front of my eyes due to the fight or flight mode I was in.  Thank God I didn't meet anyone driving in the opposite direction!

I haven't decided if I'm going to listen to any more of Morrison's Mysteries.  It may not be worth it!

Why Yes, Yes I Should!

 

Image courtesy of mememaker.net

This post is a spin-off or continuation or sequel to this post about planning for big-ticket expenses like home remodeling or vacations.

So, since that post in February of 2016, I have been able to save enough money to get the go from Captain on the kitchen remodel, and I am happy (okay, ecstatic is probably a better word) to say that later this month I will be ordering the cabinets for that project.  

We are getting all new cabinets and counters in the kitchen/dining room with that center island I talked about before.  In addition, we are getting a new dining room window and new vinyl plank flooring throughout the entire main floor except for the master bath and our two offices.  

When I met with the kitchen designer, I told him that I did not want upper cabinets on one of the walls because I am fun-size and cannot reach those cabinets.  I got a raised eyebrow about that but it's my dang kitchen and that's what works for me.  The cabinet space that is lost there will be made up by the center island and my new walk-in pantry.  

We are not changing the footprint or buying any new appliances other than a microwave range hood, so that helped keep the costs down.  The other cost saving part of the this kitchen remodel is our own elbow grease.  We--and I use the term loosely because it will mostly be Captain--will do the demo of the current cabinets and countertops, we will do the painting, and we will lay the new flooring. 

If you did the math to calculate the time from that first post to now, you will realize that I spent 7 years planning this.  I had to-scale drawings.  I had bookmarked photos in Houzz.  I spent hours scoping out kitchen displays at the big box stores in Rochester.  For all of my impulse shopping tendencies, I put a lot of thought and deliberation into this particular project.  Go me!

Photo courtesy of thediscoveriesof.com/travel-memes

The other planning project that is taking a lot of my time and attention right now and for the next three years is a trip to Aix les Bains, France, with my dragon boat team in August of 2026.  This will be my first international travel and since I do not do well with the unknown, I have been immersing myself in all thing European travel.

When Captain gently kidded me that I was wasting my excitement right now given that the trip is three years away, I reminded him that this tendency toward hyperfocus is part of my ADD struggles and he could just quit being a buzzkill.  

My absolutely favorite travel guide to watch on PBS is Rick Steves.  I just love his quirky views on off-beat places to visit and the practical budget advice he provides.  When I visited his website, I found a treasure trove of information including guidebooks for purchase which--of course--I immediately put in my shopping cart.  

There was also a travel forum where members could ask questions about European travel.  Since I have never been afraid of asking questions anywhere, any time.  Ask Molly about the shrubs I admired so much that I pulled into a complete stranger's driveway to ask what they were.

But I digress.

I promptly posted a question in the France thread explaining that I'd be there for a dragon boat festival and then I asked about day trip ideas from Aix les Bains.  I got some good answers that I can ponder over.  

The next day I was messaging a friend who will be traveling with me, and she told me about this tour guide she watched on YouTube named Rick Steves and on his website's travel forum, someone had just posted about going to a dragon boat festival in 2026 and I should check that out.  

This time I was the buzzkill when I told her that was my question.  We had a good laugh.  

In anticipation of international travel, I gathered up my drivers license, my passport card, my birth certificate, and my marriage license and went to our local county courthouse to apply for a passport book.  Turns out, because I already have a passport card, my request would be considered a renewal instead of a new request, and I could just fill out a form and mail it to the processing center along with my current passport card and a check for the fee.  

Hold it.  I have to send off my actual passport card?  Through the mail?  To some government center and hope to get it back?  Hmmmm....but, okay; if you say so.  I did take the precaution of sending it with a tracking number so I can make sure it got where it was supposed to go.  

Photo courtesy of deertravelssite.wordpress.com

Maybe the worry about that will dull the excitement of the travel, but I doubt it.  I usually lean a lot heard toward excitement than dread!

So, even though the trip is three years away yet, get ready to hear a lot more about the plans for it until it's wheels up to France!

Au revoir, mes amis!

Your Mama's Kitchen

 

Photo courtesy of Time Detective Gallery

I recently started listening to a podcast on Audible called "Your Mama's Kitchen."  It is a brand new podcast and only has two episodes available so far, and I have listened to both of them.  

The concept is that the host invite people of some celebrity or fame to visit with her about memories of their childhood kitchens, traditions their family had, what life experiences were had at the kitchen table, etc.  Then the guest shares at least one recipe from their mama's kitchen.  

It's quite interesting to listen to, and it brought back memories of my own childhood kitchen.  The first 10 years of my life we had a tiny, tiny kitchen for the five of us, and if the dishwasher door was open, there was no room to walk between it and the table.  

I know, I know.  We were blessed to even have a dishwasher.  I get it; right now it's beside the point I'm trying to make.  My mom made a lot of meals, holiday dinners, and birthday cakes in that kitchen.  

There was a built-in china hutch that served as the wall between the kitchen and the living room where all of the tableware was stored.  The refrigerator was at the narrow end of the kitchen, tucked right in next to the stove.  I can't imagine that was very energy efficient but it was the only layout that worked in that tiny space.  The work space was the counter area, maybe 8 or 10 feet long, with the sink at the very end of the counter right inside the front door.  

My strongest memory of that kitchen was when Baby Brother had a snit fit one morning.  Maybe it was because Big Brother and I were heading off to school and he had to stay home; I'm not sure.  Whatever set him off led him to chuck his wooden train toy across that kitchen where it connected with the bottom left corner of Dad's 55-gallon fish tank.  

Let's all take a collective gasp.  Fifty-five gallons of water came pouring out across the nicked and worn linoleum kitchen floor.  Big Brother and I hot-footed it out the door and left poor Mom to deal with (1) a cranky toddler, (2) a flooded kitchen floor, and (3) a dozen homeless fish.

It wasn't too many years after that when there was massive construction at Chez Brehmer.  Not only did Mom and Dad add onto the kitchen 8 feet in two directions, they had an attached garage built and resided the big old four-square farmhouse.  It was an all-summer project.  

Chet Briggs was the contractor; I don't know why I remember his name because I don't remember the name of the guy who worked with him every day.  

Every construction project has fits and starts.  I remember the first one that came up in this project was when the big picture window and the front door were framed in and Dad didn't like the layout.  After much discussion and scribbling numbers on a piece of paper, they approved having Chet switch them around.  It was a delay and an extra cost, but I remember how much Dad enjoyed being able to look out that picture window in the evenings after chores and see all of his cows content and peaceful in the pasture.  

They also had an extra cost to replace one of the garage windows because their favorite daughter was playing floor hockey with a broom and a superball that ended badly.  Broken window, bad words, and a butt-swatting.  

The garage was the summer kitchen.  All of the appliances, the table and chairs, and all the tableware were moved to the garage, and that's where we dined for the summer.  It was cooler for Mom to do her canning that summer because she could open up the overhead garage door and let the breeze in.  And the bugs, but she preferred the breeze and put up with the bugs.  

I've talked before about the conflict of favorite colors in our house.  Mom like red/orange/yellow and dad liked blue.  Ask anyone who visited our house after the kitchen remodel, and they will all say, "It was orange."  No lie.  The soffit was panted Allis Chalmers orange, the countertops were more of a flame orange with a crackled effect, and the front door was blaze orange with white accent squares...easily seen from the end of our half-mile long driveway!

I have to give Dad credit because it had to be hard for him to sit in that orange kitchen when he would have preferred it to be blue.  But come to think of it, the bathroom was blue, so I guess they found a compromise.  

That kitchen remodel project has been on my mind a lot lately because we are going to be doing our own kitchen remodel this winter.  The plans are being drawn up as I write this, and we have had more than our share of...ahem...discussions about layout, materials, color choices, and cost.  

I have to take Captain's opinion into consideration because he does all of the cooking.  I do some baking and all of the canning, but little to no actual meal preparation.  However, I am not my dad, and I drew the line at a red kitchen.  Red is not in my color wheel and I would never be comfortable with that color scheme.  

My other two lines in the sand were that I wanted a double-basin, double-drainboard reinforced cast acrylic sink and no upper cabinetry except over the stove.  Before you raise your eyebrows at that, remember that I am fun-sized and have a hard time reaching the top shelf of the fridge much less the top shelf of an upper cabinet.  

Oh wait, there is one other line in the sand, and this one has been a major bone of contention.  I want the new flooring to be the same for the entire main floor (excluding our offices and my bathroom).  Captain thinks each room should have its own flooring.  Can we say "so 1980s"?

The other major upgrade we'll do is convert a bedroom closet into a pantry by closing it off in my office and opening it up in the kitchen.  That's not a hard line in the sand yet, but it could come to that.  

We'll see how it goes.  I had them start with all the bells and whistles in the plans and we'll cut back from there.  This is why I work part-time at Fareway, so I can have some of my bells and whistles!

This kitchen has served us well for 20 years, but it's getting tired, and I'm getting tired of it.  So we will give it a "freshen up" as my grandma used to call it.  

Great Expectations

 

Image from Pinterest

For the past few years I have been on a quest to find a copy of a book that I used to read to Molly and Bigger when they were in preschool and elementary.  I couldn't remember the name of it or the author, but I knew it was about animals in a barn making animal sounds at night.  

It was a building block kind of story that repeated the stanzas throughout like "the mouse squeaked and the horse neighed."  And then the next page would be the mouse, the horse, and a duck.  Or something like that.  And I knew there was a specific term for that kind of story, but I didn't know what that was either.  

As Cubby got old enough to have books read to her and to start reading, I really, really wanted to get my hands on a copy of it and was so frustrated that I could not pin it down. 

Image courtesy of Pinterest

Then, last week, I was telling one of my coworkers about it.  She is a whiz on the Google search, and you'll never guess what?!

YES!

She found it on Amazon!  I was so happy and thrilled I bounced in my office chair and cried happy tears.  Of course I ordered it immediately from Amazon.  It's called Inside A Barn In The Country.

Image taken from Amazon

When I took my lunch break, I texted Molly to see if she was available for a phone call, and she was.  When she got on the phone, I was babbling nearly incoherently I was so excited.  After I calmed down and actually got the whole story out and said, "Isn't that awesome?"  what I got from my darling daughter was "Suuuuure, Mom.  That's great."  

Can you feel the love?

Then she went on to say how she thought I was going to tell her I found a copy of the book about the boy who visited a duck in the pond every day and one day the boy didn't come so the duck wandered up to the house and found the boy sick in bed.  

Huhn...I sense another quest in my future.  

Her lack of enthusiasm couldn't squash my thrill at my good fortune, so I called Bigger to tell him about it.  

First we had to chat about his recent week-long ice fishing trip with two different groups of friends, and then I got down to brass tacks.  

"Remember that book I read to you guys every night for months?"

"Oh yeah, the one about the farm and it had puzzles and mazes and this one optical illusion where if you held the book and moved it clockwise, the tractor tires looked like they were spinning."

No, but I see a second quest on my horizon.  

When I explained which book it was, his response was a lackluster, "Yeah, I don't remember that."

Image courtesy of Pinterest

It made me think back to my own childhood and what books I remember reading.  There was The Firehouse Cat for sure.  

Then there was the one about the firefly that was used as a train lantern signal or something.  

And the one about the elephant that kept escaping from the castle courtyard by stacking big ice blocks up and climbing over the wall.  

Oh, and there was one about a chicken and her pocketbook who used an umbrella to float to town for her groceries.

We also had a really scary kind of one about two crows who couldn't have babies because a snake kept eating the eggs, so one day they made eggs out of clay and the snake ate those and died.  Yeah, that's a real warm and fuzzy tale for a kid to read, isn't it?!

Image courtesy of Pinterest

I don't care how much of a buzz kill the kids' unenthusiastic response to my newest purchase was, I have a reminder of good times from their childhood in my possession and that makes me very happy.  

Image courtesy of Pinterest