Conversations

Of all the conversations I have every day, most of the time I'm doing good to remember (1) who I am, (2) who I am talking to, and (3) what we are talking about.  Then again, some days I am on fire!

Like the other night at my part-time job I was talking to a young male coworker who was lamenting that he just couldn't find "the one" in his life.  I told him all those relationships that didn't work out were preparing him to know what true love was when it happened because you can't know what something is if you don't know what it isn't.  He gave me genius marks for that.

However, a different young man whom I work with wasn't so appreciative of my wisdom.  He was complaining because his parents gave him a curfew even though he was almost 19 years old.  I asked him if he was living in their house?  Yes, ma'am.  Were they giving him any kind of financial support?  Yes, ma'am.  Then, my fine young man, you need to zip it and stop complaining because they are well within their rights to set a curfew. 

Some days my conversations are those where I do more listening than talking.  Like when Cubby said to me in the car last week when something caught her eye out the window.  "Gramma, that is SO cute!  Like me!"  We really need to work on bringing her out of her shell and boosting her self-esteem, don't we?!

Then there are conversations that go sideways in a hurry.  Let me give you some background on this one.

2013:
Me to Captain:  You need to drink more water in the winter to stay hydrated so you don't itch so bad.
Captain:  That doesn't make any difference at all!
2014:
Me to Captain:  You need to drink more water in the winter to stay hydrated so you don't itch so bad.
Captain:  That doesn't make any difference at all!
2015:
Me to Captain:  You need to drink more water in the winter to stay hydrated so you don't itch so bad.
Captain:  That doesn't make any difference at all!

... (years pass in the same way)

2018:
Captain to me:  I was thinking about this, and I think I need to drink more water in the winter so I don't itch so bad.
Me:  Not able to print due to the adult content of the language.

Ladies, would you agree with me that a jury of my peers would never have convicted me if I had resorted to fatal violence?!?!

We have had some odd conversations happen in this house over the years.  One of the more memorable ones was when Molly's high school boyfriend was coming to our house for the first time.  Molly was giving Captain the rules of conduct for the encounter, as follows:

"Dad, you have to remember these three things when he gets here:  Number one, you can't sing.  Number two, you can't fart.  And number three, you have to wear pants."  I am nearly 100% certain nothing even close to this conversation has happened in other households.  We do love to be unique around here!

Is anyone else like me and has entire conversations with themselves?  No?  Okay, that's just me I guess. 

When I think about having conversations, I try to remember what my mama told me way back in the day.  "God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason.  Listen more, talk less."  Smart lady, my mama!

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